Managing when you are busy, stressed, and unwell

workundertime

I have spoken often about what an awful year it has been for my family and I. While we were managing fairly well for a long time, recently we were suddenly not-managing-well at all. With so many balls up in the air already, when a few more balls were added in, suddenly things started falling down…hard.

I would be remiss if I didn’t mention that this is all on my head. Mr. Tucker continues to be the stalwart partner he has always been, albeit with a few more cracks in the façade. The dark, depressing days of winter piled high with added work responsibilities and coupled with work uncertainty & continuing kid responsibilities has left me completely wiped. It seems like these days I can manage the basics of work and maybe one other thing but then I am done for and end up in bed early. Mr. Tucker has picked up the load of housework, childcare, and other life-management stuff while I convalesced in a myriad of different ways. The last two months have been especially hard, and it seems in a lot of ways the small joys have been sucked out of our lives, making the challenges even more apparent. Our entire family is feeling the strain.

Of course, this also means that financially we’ve spent more money than we usually do to fill in the gaps. Late hours at work combined with exhaustion has left us eating out more, working weekends means our house is messier, and we’ve thrown money at a few things that we’d otherwise figured out alternatives for. On one hand, I am super grateful that our finances are organized in such a way that overspending doesn’t put us that behind our goals, on the other hand, I am kicking myself for buying more single-serving foods when we’d bake or make stuff for lunches. Still, we are ahead and since I haven’t updated for February, here is where we sit for savings goals as of Feb 28th:

Not bad, huh? We are 1/7 of the way there and we still have 9 more months to go. Once I do our taxes this month, I will have a better idea of where we stand and what – if any – contingency plans we need to put in place.

Until then, I seem to be coming out of the fog that is this depression and while I will take it for now, I am pretty sure I will learn in April that I will need another surgery and that may throw me back into it. This fog combined with stress has also meant I have bailed on physiotherapy too long, so this week I made the move to get back on it. Right now I am taking pride in the little steps I am taking to improve my life: reading for personal happiness, taking care of my diet, incorporating exercise into my day, and writing again. No promises that all these things will make me happier, quicker but they are baby steps. But sometimes baby steps are all you need to climb out.